Many apologies for being MIA for almost six months.  I started a new job (WOO!) and I needed to gather more material.  And gather material I have.  Thank you all for sticking around through the slump.  I promise to make the wait worth it!

In the last six months, I’ve dated a handful of people who haven’t worked out.  At this point, not much can surprise me in dating but, once in a while, a good one gets through my strict screening process.  Good in that they provide a tale for the blog. One story comes to mind, in particular, from this past summer.  I was seeing a guy whom I met online.  He is a traveling surgical tech from the south somewhere and was only in the Bay Area for a short while.  We had gone on a couple dates but I couldn’t shake the feeling I got that he was gay.  I’m not sure if it was the southern accent or his mannerisms or what but my gaydar was going off like nobody’s business.  Now I’m totally up for new friends, gay, straight or otherwise, but I had met this guy on a straight dating site so I was super confused.

What truly solidified my thought on this guy’s orientation was something that happened one night when we went to dinner.  I had pulled my very cute, dark green Kate Spade purse to my lap to look for my wallet when my date gasped, “IS THAT A KATE SPADE!” as he brought his hand to his decolletage.

I looked at him askance, unable to hide the surprise/confusion on my face, and nodded yes as I pulled out my wallet.  My expression must not have bothered him because he then exclaimed, “Is that Kate Spade too!?!”.  I said yes, again, mostly in disbelief.  I then let him know my iPhone case was Kate Spade as well, before he fainted dead away when he saw it.  He went on and on about how much he loved Kate Spade and how much he liked my items.  I was legit worried he was going to try to take the purse for himself!

As an experiment, I proceeded to ask my straight guy friends if they knew who or what Kate Spade was.  Most just shrugged.  I did have one who knew it had to do with purses but he said wouldn’t be able to identify one if he tried.

I had to have the “let’s just be friends” talk with the dude.  He is a cool guy just not someone I could ever be in a relationship with.  It was definitely not one of my worst stories but an odd one nonetheless.

Since this was a short one, I’ll leave you with this quick story from yesterday.  I get a number of messages that I do not reply to when I’m online dating.  The one I received yesterday, that I will not be replying to, said, “Do you like teddy bear shaped wine guys?  If yes you should message me. I am Andrew”.  I read this to Danielle and she laughed and said, “What the hell does that mean!?”.  I immediately replied, “Short arms and no dick.”

Thanks, folks! I’ll be posting again very soon!